Posted: September 25, 2012 in Uncategorized

I’ve really been feeling a bit lost the last month or so. I don’t know whether it’s about quitting smoking, or the end of summer thing or what, but lately I feel as if I’ve lost what little motivation I had. I haven’t gone for a walk in four days even though I’ve been off work all this time. I don’t call people I should, even my chats with my mum seem to be happening less often. I hate this feeling, I can usually shake it after a few days, but it seems as if it has gone on for weeks. Even the writing thing seems to have become more difficult. I feel as if I haven’t written anything worth reading in months. I just wish that I could figure out what it is that I really want to do with my life. If the only point to my existence was to grow old and die, what the fuck was the point of all. Lately I’m half hoping for something bad to happen because it seems more appealing than to have nothing happen at all. I really have wasted my existence and now I have no idea how to start over. I’m hoping that my life is a fairy tale and I just haven’t gotten to the happily ever after part yet. I guess I’ve always been too much of a dreamer.


Your Fool



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