What? Of Course I’m Sane.

Posted: November 1, 2012 in Uncategorized

Ok, so every time I say that I’m going to write more, I end up writing less, so I’ve decided to forgo that increasingly inaccurate prediction this time round. I could make a million excuses for not having the time to do so but the really is that mostly I’ve just become horribly lazy. I tend to go through periods like this where I just can’t seem to come up with anything interesting to say so I hope you’ll forgive me for writing so little.

I was on a training course this week at work. Twice a year we get stuck doing refresher training for a week just to ensure that we never get to comfortable in doing our jobs. This week’s topic was something called Beyond Design Base Events (BDBE). An example of a Design Base event would be “OMG, the shit has hit the fan, thank goodness we took the time to plan ahead for this type of horrible calamity and built the place accordingly.” At the end everyone pats each other on the back and congratulates themselves for their prudence and foresight.

An example of a  Beyond Design Base Event would be “OMFG who would have thought that we would need to fend off a Venusian attack precisely at the time that a Design base Event occurred. If only our forefathers had envisioned this type of event in the construction of our temple. Fortunately we took the time to consult the great Oracle and have purchased a ridiculously expensive,  giant galactic battle blaster to save the day. And they laughed at us when we first proposed the idea. You can never have enough Emergency Mitigating Equipment.”

If anyone is still wondering where I’m employed, truth is that I work at a soft ice cream stand. Hey, in the end if a really hot day comes around, you’ll be glad that we went that extra mile to ensure that the ice cream never stopped flowing. They do tend to pay me a surprisingly large sum of money to do this, but I suspect that it’s mostly for my stunningly good looks. I think that most would agree that I provide a valuable service to mankind and should be rewarded for it.

So ends my work for the week. It is exceptionally cruel to make us work four days in a row, but I’m now used to their near insufferable cruelty. I’m don’t usually come home at 4 PM  and I’m not sure why I have to share the freeway with all of those other cars. I can’t even imagine why they would think that it’s acceptable to disrupt my drive home. What would it take for them to leave an hour later? All of those people better watch out if I ever become supreme god.

 

Your Fool

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Comments
  1. pinkagendist says:

    I find working a sort of Sisyphus affair…

  2. I always worried about the rocks, but anyway, around here they’ve run out of downhills, so it looks like its back to the drawboard again..

  3. makagutu says:

    You sure do save mankind, sometimes it’s too hot we need ice cream to cool it off eh 🙂